Chapter 118
Lily POV
After the pack doctors and nurses filed out, the room fell into a heavy silence. Kai remained at the doorway like a statue carved from tension and unspoken words. He hadn’t said anything to me since entering. He just stood thee with his eyes fixed somewhere above my head.
Celeste was the one who finally broke the suffocating silence.
Celeste exhaled loudly, crossing her arms as she turned to him. “Are you just going to stand there, or aren’t you leaving too?” Her voice had a protective edge to it that I had never heard before, as if she expected Kai to turn into the monster I had barely escaped from.
Kai’s gaze flickered to her, but he didn’t rise to the bait. “I want to see Lily,” he said quietly.
Celeste let out a humorless laugh. “You can see her just fine from there.” She gestured at me with an exaggerated wave. “Mission accomplished. Now, go p>
“Alone. I want to see her alone, Celeste. Is it that hard for you to understand p>
“Maybe,” Celeste bristled. “I don’t care if you’re my brother or the Alpha but you don’t get to do what you want at all times. There’s no way in hell I’ll be leaving her alone with you p>
His jaw clenched, but he didn’t argue. Instead, he lifted his left wrist, revealing the restriction band fastened snugly around it. The sight of it made my heart sink. It was the kind they put on werewolves who couldn’t control their strength, their instincts. The kind meant to suppress their abilities, their rage.
“I have this,” Kai said, his voice rough, as if the words tasted bitter. “I’ll be fine with her, Celeste. Please p>
Celeste scoffed. “Oh, you’ll be fine? That’s supposed to reassure me? After everything?” She turned to me, her expression screaming reluctance. “Lily p>
I reached for her hand, squeezing gently. “It’s okay,” I murmured. “I’ll be fine p>
Her eyes widened with disbelief. “Don’t tell me you’re falling for his antics. He knew he could use a restriction band, why didn’t he get one from the first day the whole thing started? Why did he have to wait until things got worse p>
“Let’s not go into all of that,” I said quietly, trying to put on a reassuring smile. “It’s fine p>
She hesitated, searching my face for any sign of doubt, but finally sighed in defeat. “I’ll be right outside,” she said, glaring at Kai. “And if I hear so much as a whisper of distress from her, I won’t hesitate to put you in a hospital bed too p>
Kai said nothing as she stalked past him, brushing his shoulder roughly on her way out. The door shut behind her with a soft thud.
And then we were alone.
A heavy silence stretched between us. He was still standing by the door as if he was afraid to come closer. The Kai I knew, the one I had read about, the one whose reputation preceded him and made everyone scared – seemed to have been replace by this uncertain figure who couldn’t meet my eyes.
I studied him, waiting for him to say something—anything—but he remained mute, his fists clenched at his sides.
“Kai?” I finally broke the silence, my voice barely above a whisper.
His name on my lips seemed to snap something in him. His head dropped, and for the first time since stepping into the room, he looked at me. Really looked at me. And what I saw in his eyes made my stomach twist painfully. Guilt.
“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice hoarse. “For everything p>
I inhaled sharply, but before I could respond, he continued.
“I never planned for any of this to happen,” he murmured running a hand through his hair, a gesture to show he was frustrated. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t understand it, Lily. I—” He swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing. “I need you to forgive me p>
My heart ached at the vulnerability in his voice. “Kai, it wasn’t your fault,” I whispered. “I know that p>
I stretched my left hand towards him, offering him the smallest bit of reassurance, hoping he would take it, that he would come closer. But he didn’t move. He stayed rooted to the floor as if an invisible force was holding him back, staring at my outstretched hand as if it might burn him.
And then, he shattered me with three words.
“Let’s break up p>
The words didn’t register at first. They hung in the air between us.
My breath caught in my throat. For a moment, I thought I had misheard him. “What p>
His fingers curled into fists. “I said let’s break up,” he repeated. “It’s the only way to keep you safe p>
My outstretched hand fell limply to the bed. All the times he’d hurt me, all the fear and pain and confusion – none of it had prepared me for this moment.
I felt like the ground had been ripped out from under me. “Kai, no. You don’t mean that. You’re wearing the restriction band. Let’s try to fix things together p>
His jaw tightened, but he wouldn’t look at me. “I do. And the restriction band is temporary p>
“No, you don’t!” My voice cracked as I struggled to sit up straighter. “You’re just—You’re scared. You’re trying to push me away because you think it’s what’s best. But you don’t get to decide that for me p>
His eyes flashed with something unreadable, and for the briefest moment, I thought he would argue. But then his face smoothed over, turning emotionless. Cold.
“You’re wrong,” he said. “This is the only choice I have p>
I shook my head violently. “That’s not true. We can fix this. We can figure it out together p>
A bitter smile ghosted his lips. “And what if I hurt you again, Lily? What if next time, it’s worse? I can’t risk hurting you again, Lily. Like my mate. I lost control and killed her. I don’t want that to happen to you p>
I opened my mouth, but no words came out.
“T-that’s not true!” I finally regained myself. “That didn’t happen p>
“It did,” he said firmly. “Lots of my memories is coming back and I can’t risk that,” he said. “Not with you p>
Tears burned at the back of my eyes. “So you’re just giving up on us p>
His face twisted with pain, but he forced himself to stand firm. “I have to p>
I shook my head, gripping the sheets beneath me. “No, you don’t.” My voice trembled, thick with desperation. “Kai, please. Don’t do this p>
He took a step back.
The worst part was that I could see it in his eyes – the genuine pain, the self-loathing, the desperate need to protect me from himself. This wasn’t the rage filled man who had put me in this hospital bed. This was the Kai I had fallen in love with, the one who always tried to do what was right for everyone else, even at his own expense.
“This is goodbye, Lily,” he said softly.
“No!” I shook my head violently. “I am going to break up with you. I am not rejecting you, Kai. Maybe we need I trailed off looking for the right word. “A break. Yes!” I nodded. “Let’s take a break and come back. I love you, Kai. This… whatever it is that’s happening will pass too. I just need you to understand that p>
“Lily,” he sighed
I interrupted him. “I will move out of the packhouse and back to my dormitory and stay away from you, don’t worry. I’ll not be in your hair p>
“Lily he sighed again.
“No more words about it. I don’t want to hear it. Celeste!” I shouted Celeste’s name with the rest of my strength and immediately she showed up.
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
“Please take him away,” I said quietly.