Chapter 129
Kai POV
Pain flashed across my mother’s face. “The building was collapsing. You had the human girl in your arms, but your mate was still inside. She told you to go, to save the human. She promised she would find another way out p>
“But she didn’t,” I said, the words like ash in my mouth.
My mother shook her head. “By the time you got the human to safety and tried to go back, it was too late. The building collapsed. Your mate was trapped inside p>
A wave of grief crashed over me—not the abstract guilt I’d carried for years, but raw, visceral loss for a woman whose name I couldn’t even remember.
“Why can’t I remember her name?” I asked, my voice breaking. “Why can’t I remember her face clearly p>
“The trauma was too great. Your wolf was going mad with grief and rage. The pack healer had to suppress your memories for your own safety and for the safety of everyone around you p>
I ran my hands through my hair, tugging at the roots as if the pain might bring clarity. “So, that’s why you erased my memories? you’ve been keeping me from finding another mate because… what? You think I’ll go crazy again p>
My mother’s eyes filled with tears—something I’d rarely seen in my life. “That is exactly why, Kai. I saw what the mate bond did to you once. I watched my son slowly lose his mind. You were consumed by her. You couldn’t sleep, couldn’t eat. You would hurt yourself just to find a moment of calm. I couldn’t risk it happening again p>
I squeezed my eyes shut as flashes of pain flickered behind my eyelids—memories I couldn’t fully grasp. Scars I couldn’t explain.
“You were spiraling,” she went on, her voice shaking now. “The bond was poisoning you p>
I shook my head violently.
“No p>
“Yes.” Her voice was sharp now, cutting through my denial.
I opened my eyes to find her staring at me, her face pale and drawn.
“I thought if I broke the bond… if I made you forget her… you’d be free p>
Anger surged inside me, hot and uncontrollable.
“You played Goddess with my life!” I roared, jumping to my feet. My wolf howled beneath my skin,. “You had no right p>
My mother’s eyes flashed, but she didn’t back down.
“I had every right!” she shot back. “I am your mother, Kai! I would rather have you hate me for the rest of your life than watch you destroy yourself! “It was my duty as your mother and as Luna of this pack. You have no idea what you were like, Kai. The power that poured from you was unlike anything I’d ever seen. You nearly killed three packmates who tried to hold you back from running into the flames after her. If your father hadn’t been there to subdue you p>
Her voice cracked at the last word, and for a moment… the fight drained out of both of us.
I stood there, chest heaving, fists clenched at my sides. I turned away, unable to look at her. My entire understanding of myself, of my past, had been built on lies and half-truths.
My heart felt like it was being ripped in two.
I wanted to scream.
I wanted to break something.
I wanted to believe she was lying—because if she was telling the truth p>
Then I wasn’t a monster.
I was a victim.
But that didn’t make the pain any easier to bear.
I sank back down onto the bed, burying my face in my hands.
“Why now?” I whispered. “Why tell me this now? After all these years p>
My mother slowly sat beside me, her hand resting lightly on my shoulder. She was silent for so long that I thought she might not answer. When she did, her voice was barely above a whisper.
“Because I saw it happening again and I’ve seen what happens if I don’t tell you. From what I see, it’s the same thing with Lily, whether I interfere or not. And if I try to keep you apart She shuddered. “The consequences would be worse than what happened before p>
I froze, my heart stopping in my chest.
“What p>
Her grip on my shoulder tightened.
“I thought you were going to talk about Mia. Didn’t she look like my first mate. It was her face I saw and not Lily’s. I had felt a strange pull towards her p>
“I’m not worried about the other woman. She cannot be your first mate. Your first mate died in our eyes. Her ashes were brought out. Maybe they just look alike and I felt she was distracting you. But with Lily p>
My heart pounded painfully against my ribs.
“No p>
“It’s the same pull, Kai.” Her voice was gentle now, as if she was afraid I would shatter under the truth. “I see it in your eyes every time you look at her. That same madness is starting to rise inside you again p>
I clenched my fists so tightly my nails bit into my palms.
“No.” I shook my head. “She’s not like that. She’s different p>
“That’s what you said the first time too p>
Her words sliced through me like a knife.
I shot to my feet, pacing the length of the room like a caged animal.
My wolf growled in protest—fighting, snarling, refusing to believe it.
“Is that why you went as far as trying to arrange between me and Briella knowing fully well that Lily is my mate. She’s my second chance mate, mom. Do you know how hard that is to find p>
“And you’re spiralling the same way as you did with the first,” she fired back. “You’re going into depression because p>
“I stayed away from Lily for her own good. I was beginning to be violent, mom p>
“That’s what I’m saying. She could be the one triggering it p>
“And yet nothing happened all this while. I only started acting weird after Mia’s death. It’s not linked to Lily. I love her. I agree I was confused and it’s all because I had no idea what to do with my memories. I didn’t understand any one of them. But now. things are clearer p>
“So, you’re still going to go back to Lily?” My mom arched a brow.
“I made a mistake, I should never had stayed away from her in the first place. I need to go find her p>
“Kai p>
I ignored my mother and finished dressing up. Practically rushing out of the room. I need to find Lily.