Chapter 141
~ NYSSA
His lips lingered on mine for barely the fraction of a second before he was pulling back.
My cheeks warmed as heat crawled up my spine. The kiss had caught me off guard and although short, it was enough to send shivers down my spine and a burst of arousal between my thighs.
“I apologize for that,” he murmured under his breath, smoothing his shirt as he lowered himself back into his chair. “I would have let you finish but I he trailed off with a shrug. “I didn’t mean to interrupt. You may continue p>
The tips of his ears tinged pink and he glanced away, a sheepish smile on his face.
I couldn’t help but crack a smile to myself. Who would have thought that the King would be embarrassed after a small kiss?
“I’ve said all I have to say,” I shrugged, fisting my hands in my lap. “This whole thing is confusing p>
“It doesn’t have to be.” He leaned forward on his elbows. “What do you want p>
“Why are you asking me?” I asked awkwardly, shifting uncomfortably in my seat. “There’s two of us in this… mating. You haven’t said shit about what you want p>
“Because the problem has never been what I want. I want you. I don’t care if that’s just having you in my pack and in my bed p>
My cheeks warmed at his words. “That’s crude p>
He ignored me and kept going. “Or if that’s having you as my mate officially in a goddamn ceremony. What matters is how you want to play this. I’m willing to do this either way p>
He leaned back in his chair, his hands crossed over his chest. He was the epitome of ease, but I did not miss the flash of worry in his eyes as he stared down at me.
It would have been so easy to just say I wanted to be his mate. Hell, the words were at the tip of my tongue but I could not bring myself to utter them. Agreeing to be his mate was more than just him… it was agreeing to be the Queen and the thought of that terrified me.
“Can I think about the mating part for a while?” I asked softly.
Disappointment flashed in his eyes. “Of course p>
“It’s not that I don’t want it,” I added quickly, trying to explain. “I just… I’d like some time to figure out what that actually entails. I still want to be with you, but I don’t want to rush into a mating. I just p>
He leaned forward, taking my hands into his. He rubbed small circles over the back of my hands, a small smile tugging at his lips as he spoke. “You don’t have to explain yourself to me, little wolf. I told you I wanted to do this however you did. If what you need is time, then you’ll have as much of it as you need p>
“Thank you p>
He waved me off. “I think now is as good a time as any to have dinner, don’t you?” My stomach took that as a cue to rumble loudly and he laughed. “Understood p>
Two women came out of nowhere a few moments later, carrying with them trays of steaming hot food. It smelled so good, and it tasted good too.
At first, I was worried that our earlier conversation would make things awkward but it was as if the conversation did not even happen. Rowan was kind and gentle, even going as far as to help me cut up my steak when I seemed to be having issues with it.
By the time we returned to the palace, I was so fucking full, but most of all, I was happy because I had such a good day. It was arguably one of the best I’d ever had.
“You’re smiling,” Rowan noted as he walked me towards my room. “I take that to mean I did a good job p>
My smile widened. “It was decent p>
He laughed loudly, the sound echoing off the walls. “I’ll do better next time p>
At that I stopped and turned to him with wide eyes. “Next time p>
“You didn’t think that would be the only time, did you? If I’m going to court you, Nyssa, I am going to do it right.” He leaned forward, brushing a strand of my hair behind my ears as he lowered his lips to mine.
His lips were soft and he tasted like the wine we had earlier. I rose on my toes and kissed him back, my fingers finding their way behind his head to pull him closer.
He groaned against my mouth, nipping on my bottom lip until I opened for him. His tongue slid into my mouth, warm and dominant.
He backed me into a wall, his hand finding my hip as he deepened the kiss. His hips rocked into mine, his erection hard against my lower belly.
He pulled back with a curse. “No p>
“No p>
“Yes, no,” he ran his hands through his hair. “Fuck… I’m going to do this right, so no, I’m not going to fuck you, as much as I desperately want to p>
His fists clenched tightly by his side, his eyes squeezed shut as he exhaled deeply.
I took a step towards him but his eyes flew open, his hands shooting out to keep me in place.
“I need you to go back to your room, Nyssa, can you do that p>
I nodded slowly. “I can, but p>
“Please, and lock the door behind you p>
I wasn’t sure if it was the pleading look in his eyes or the guttural growl that left his lips that encouraged me to begin moving. I scurried into my room, locking the door behind me as I did.
I heard him approach, heard him rest in front of my door, his breaths ragged. He stood there for a full minute before I heard his door open and shut.
My insides were jelly, and my stomach churned with need. I wanted nothing more than to storm into his room and demand that he finish what he started but I couldn’t, not when he’d asked me not to.
So I crawled into bed, and with the lights dim, I slipped my hands underneath my clothes.