Chapter 276
Alpha
I felt lighter; the mountain of guilt seemed to melt away into a boulder after my confession. She needed to know how much I was to blame and how much I loved her, and only her.
Zara struggled to find the words when I confessed, and I knew she wasn’t ready for any kind of commitment with someone like me. Her pupils dilated, and I saw myself in them, and only myself.
A selfish part of me wanted to believe she wanted me just as much as she had before our lives fell apart. Before the Winter Formal. Before I hurt her and left her heart so wounded.
She would need a lot of healing… maybe even time apart. But now I believed in my love and knew we would find our way back together.
Someday—someday.
I needed to leave and give her space without overwhelming her. She’d asked for time, and I needed to respect her wishes now. But I couldn’t do this without a kiss. Without the feel of her lips on mine.
It would sustain me. In the darkest hours. In the longest nights. It would remind her that she was mine.
“Let me kiss you, Phoenix.” I hoped she’d say yes, but I half-thought she’d simply reject me and kick me out.
But she didn’t. She was more attentive than I ever could be. Her trembling hands came to my face, and she whispered, “After this, you’ll have to go p>
I quickly replied before she could change her mind: “I promise I will. But if you need someone to talk to, you know I’m always here p>
I carefully laid her down on the pillow, straightening her up. She looked at me with her soft blue eyes, filled with deep emotion.
Her chest rose and fell slowly in that stupid hospital gown; her nipples stuck out, as if to say, “Hello p>
Seductive, even she herself, she was so seductive, and I had to restrain myself. Hovering over her, without pressing anything, I placed both hands on her head and pressed my lips to hers, capturing her swollen and bruised lips.
If I could, I would kiss every bruise on her skin, every mark left by that devil, but it was still too soon. I wasn’t even sure if she was ready to show and tell everyone everything they did to her.
Would she ever be ready?
So I was going to pour all my love and emotion into this kiss. I wasn’t sure when I’d be able to kiss her or hug her again.
Gently and delicately, I explored her lips. Luna’s hands fell on my arms, and she held them, slowly breathing into my mouth. I felt her fear, her trembling, the trembling of her lips beneath mine.
I sensed her anxiety, her fears, and the rage she’d endured over the past few days. Her lips were completely swollen, the lower one cut and swollen, and I memorized every bruise I saw.
She squeezed my hands, begging me to lower myself onto her. I didn’t want to hurt her, but I complied. Carefully, I lay down on her body, and she released me.
Feeling every curve of her body, I felt the softness disappear… I felt her ribs pressing against me, her thighs losing their thickness.
It broke me; the very thought that I was to blame for turning her into a skeleton shattered me completely.
Closing my eyes, I tried to drown out the guilt, but it only grew stronger with each new bone that pressed against me. Holding her face, I deepened the kiss, silently vowing to help her recover.
Tears streamed from her eyes, wetting my hands and the bandages on her face. Releasing her lips, I moved mine to her eyes, drinking in the salty water. My silent plea for her not to cry.
She sobbed, trying to hold back the tears, but they flowed like a stream. I took my time, and she let me. Her hands gently caressed my hair.
She said nothing.
Why did it feel like a silent farewell from her? The pain sank deep into my heart, like a burning coal buried and left there.
I slowly stepped back, never taking my eyes off her. She watched with dark eyes as I leaned over her stomach and placed my hand on her dress.
“May I?” I asked, and she nodded slowly.
Holding the hem of her dress, I slowly lifted it, revealing her flat stomach. There were no bruises, and I sighed with relief.
I pulled the dress up so that it lay just below her chest. Her ribs protruded from the flesh. It was a sight unfamiliar to me.
My eyes raked every part of her exposed flesh and finally settled on her lower abdomen, where the life we had created together quietly rested, growing larger with each passing day.
I wondered how big it was. As if reading my thoughts, she calmly replied,
“He’s the size of a sesame seed. His heart, brain, and spinal cord are already forming. He has two small eyes and the tip of his nose. You can talk to him if you want. I’m sure he’ll understand,” Zara said quietly, and I sensed the lightness and awe in her words.
Heart? Eyes? Brain? How can such a tiny creature contain so much? Just thinking about it made my stomach churn.
Tears.
She looked at me adoringly, seeing how lost I was in my thoughts. All these new emotions p>
“Kane!” she called out to me with such tenderness that my tear-stained gaze shifted to her.
“It’s okay what you feel. He’s your child, too p>
Something inside me broke, filling my heart with boundless love for the mother of my child and for that “sesame seed” inside her.
Lowering myself, I placed my lips exactly where I thought that little bundle was and kissed her tenderly.
Damn! Exactly.
My “sesame seed” and my mate. My wolf was happy, with his cub and with his mate.