Chapter 250
Sierra brought that light back into their eyes. She was what they looked forward to and now, without her, I’m terrified that all the progress they made will unravel.
I stroke Nova’s hair and murmur, “I know. I’m sorry p>
They don’t respond. They just cling to me, as if I’m the only thing keeping them upright.
I try to comfort them. Try to distract them. It works but only for a little while.
Then Nolan speaks again. “We wanted her to be our mommy p>
The words hit me like a punch to the chest.
I don’t think anything I’ve heard today hurts as much as that. They tear through me like a tornado, leaving nothing untouched in its wake.
“What?” I breathe.
Nova nods furiously. “Yeah! You could marry her, Daddy. Then she’d be our mommy and our brother wouldn’t have to live far away p>
I freeze. The air in my lungs turns to ice, like shards of glass piercing straight through my chest.
“What, brother p>
My heart starts pounding, hard and fast. I look between them, searching their faces, hoping, praying, that this is nothing more than childish imagination.
“Did Sierra tell you something?” I ask sharply.
Nolan frowns. “We’re five. Not stupid p>
My jaw tightens especially when he rolls his eyes at me, like he’s the adult and I’m the one being dense.
“She’s carrying your baby,” he continues matter-of-factly. “So that’s our sibling p>
I rise to my feet slowly, anger flaring hot and sudden. I told her to keep her fucking mouth shut and she went and told my children anyway. Does she have a fucking death wish?
“She told you that?” I snap.
“No,” Nova says quickly. “We figured it out p>
I stare at them. “How p>
Nolan shrugs. “Why would you bring her into our house and take care of her if the baby wasn’t yours p>
The logic is simple. Brutally so, and I can see exactly how they arrived at that conclusion.
I drag a hand down my face. “It’s… that—that’s not p>
“You don’t have to make up a lie, Daddy,” Nova says softly. “We’re okay with it p>
My chest tightens. “Okay with what p>
“With Sierra having our baby brother or sister,” Nolan says. “And with her being our mom p>
Something twists painfully in my chest.
Hadn’t Nolan said something similar weeks ago? Which means this isn’t new. This is something they’ve talked about. Thought about. Wanted.
My heart sinks as realization hits me once again, I jumped to conclusions. Once again, I blamed Sierra.
“I—” I stop. Try again. “It’s not that simple p>
“It could be,” Nova insists. “We love her, and we love you. So you should bring her back, and we can be a family p>
I have no words. For the second time today, I’m completely speechless.
I know my children. Once they set their minds on something, there’s no changing it, and explaining the truth to two five-year-olds is impossible. They won’t understand. They won’t want to understand.
So instead, my thoughts latch onto something else. Something far more dangerous… I can’t let what they believe spread. No one can know that I fathered Sierra’s child.
I kneel again, forcing my voice to stay calm. “You can’t tell anyone about the baby p>
They both go still.
“Why?” Nova asks, her brow furrowing in confusion.
I don’t explain.
“Just promise me you won’t tell anyone,” I repeat. “Not a single person p>
Nolan studies me for a long moment, then nods slowly. “Okay p>
Nova nods too. “We promise p>
“But,” Nolan adds, “only if we can still see Sierra p>
I stiffen. “What p>
“Unlimited access,” he says seriously. “We can visit her whenever we want and call her as much as we want… and you’ll get us phones so we can call her p>
I don’t like it. Not one bit. Because it means she’ll stay tangled in our lives. In mine… but when I look at them, at how hollow they already seem, I know I don’t really have a choice.
“…Fine,” I say quietly.
They relax instantly, like the deal has sealed something important.
Nova hugs me again. “Thank you, Daddy p>
I hold them, staring at nothing, realizing far too late that whatever this is? it isn’t over. Not by a long shot.