Chapter 321
The moment I walk inside, I find Mom and Dad are sitting in the living room, exactly where I left them earlier.
Mom’s posture is rigid, her arms crossed tightly over her chest. Dad looks calmer, but the tension in his face is impossible to miss.
Mom’s eyes snap to me the moment I enter. “Where the hell were you p>
I don’t answer.
“You went to Sierra’s house, didn’t you?” she presses.
I shrug out of my jacket and toss it over the arm of the chair before finally meeting her gaze.
“Yes p>
Her jaw tightens. “And p>
I run a hand over my face. “I didn’t get to talk to her, but she seemed fine p>
I can’t bring myself to tell her that I saw her with her boyfriend. That shock, that uncomfortable pain, is still raw for me to speak it out loud and have her dissect it.
Mom lets out a bitter laugh. “Seemed? How can she be fine after what happened tonight p>
I stay quiet because she’s right. Sierra probably wasn’t fine, and she was seeking comfort from her new man.
“Do you have any idea how embarrassed I was tonight?” she demands.
Her voice isn’t screaming. It’s worse… It’s controlled, with an edge in it and filled with a kind of disappointment that cuts deeper than any anger.
“Do you fucking know how horrible I felt to be told my son asked the sweetest, most kindest girl in the world to abort her child because you deemed her unworthy p>
Each word lands like a blow, each one of them hitting me till I feel like I’m nothing but a pounded piece of flesh.
“How could you, Noah?” she asks, the pain and disappointment clear in her voice. “How could you do that p>
My throat tightens, “I sorry p>
“Sorry isn’t going to fix anything!” she snaps. “Because right now I’m having a hard time understanding how the hell the son I raised with so much love became the kind of man who would ask a woman to destroy an innocent life simply because it inconvenienced him p>
I drop my gaze, the feeling of guilt and regret burying me so deep I’m not sure I can ever claw my way out of this.
“You’re right… I was wrong for that and it’s something I will forever regret doing p>
She stops; the anger in her expression flickers with surprise.
“You’re damn right I’m right,” she says, but there’s less fire behind the words now.
“I was angry and confused and at that time I still thought she was the enemy so I reacted like an idiot and I hurt her again,” I admit quietly.
Mom studies me carefully.
“You’ve hurt her so many times, Noah… so many times I even lost count,” she says. “But this… you probably made her feel unworthy of you when in reality, you’re the one who’s unworthy of her p>
I nod because there’s no point pretending otherwise. Sierra told me herself how my mistreatment of her made her doubt her own self-worth… This must have reinforced that.
I destroyed her and kept doing it over and over again.
Mom exhales sharply, shaking her head. “And the fact that you stood there, watching me blame her when you know very well she didn’t tell me because you demanded it of her! What the hell is wrong with you p>
My chest tightens painfully because once again she’s right… I didn’t come to Sierra’s defense; instead, I stood there frozen while she blamed her.
I was in shock when I realized the truth about the baby was out in the open for everyone to know, and because of that, I didn’t react quickly enough… That’s on me.
“How did I give birth to a son like you p>
Dad finally speaks, “That’s enough, Ava p>
Mom turns toward him. “It’s not enough, Rowan p>
“It is,” he says calmly. “He already knows he screwed up… No need to beat him down when he’s already at rock bottom p>
She scoffs. “He never learns when it comes to Sierra p>
Dad ignores her and leans forward slightly, his elbows resting on his knees. “Noah… I want to know what you are going to do about this whole mess, about Sierra and the baby p>
The question hangs in the air and Mom goes quiet for the first time since I came back, waiting to hear my answer.
I think about Sierra and my chest aches at the memory of how she looked at me at her mom’s house and how she clung to her boyfriend.
Something heavy and painful settles inside me, as the thought of losing her for good nearly causes my heart to stop.
“I’m going to fight for a chance.” I answer him, determination settling in my bones.
Mom scoffs quietly. “You better pray she even gives you one p>
And for the first time in my life…I’m not sure she will.